"I looked up and saw the WestSide Waffle! sign with its big red 'W’s,'" she says. "And I realized it was true – he won. Then I started thinking about my life and I realized that I couldn’t go on living in a country where a war-mongering baby-killer holds the highest office in the land. I guess I lost it."Is her name pronounced whiner or wiener?
Asked why she hasn’t sued Mr. Kerry for capitulating, Ms. Weiner said, "That’s just like a Republican – blame the victim. How would it be fair for me to sue Mr. Kerry for losing to the vast right-wing conspiracy?"
Ms. Weiner says her life has become very circumscribed since the election. "Before my breakdown I used to enjoy walking around my neighborhood. This is a very diverse area and it used to be such a pleasure to know that everyone you passed on the street thought about life exactly the same way you did… Now I can’t be sure that the person walking next to me isn’t one of that 17 percent who voted for the war-mongering liar… I can’t bear to go out any more. It’s so distressing."
No stranger to lawsuits, several years ago Ms. Weiner won an undisclosed amount, rumored to be in the tens of millions, when she sued Moonraker’s Coffee for having addicted her to caffeine.
Thursday, November 25, 2004
[Insert Liberal Joke Here]
Barbi Weiner, a New York third grade teacher currently on disability, is suing the Republican party for having taken an active role in returning George Bush to the White House, a circumstance that resulted in Ms. Weiner suffering a nervous collapse Nov.8th.
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2 comments:
This is not real. If you did any sort of fact checking, like look at the article comments, you would know it is a satire.
Great, welcome to the community. If you don't have a screen name yet, I'd like to suggest "Mr. Obvious Guy".
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